Review Comments

• This is a good start to a project, but you must continue to question every decision to make sure that you create the effect that you want to. Keep pushing the work, there is still time to make major changes if necessary.

• What is the intention of the work? There is a difficult mix of simulation of a stalkers room, and theatrical performance of horror. Your intention is to make it theatrical, but there is a chance that it will just look muddled, and an awkward simulation. You really need to test how it all works together, and have other plans about howto use the elements you have made. Might the clouds and audio work better as a separate piece outside the room? How might they make the viewer feel?

• There is always a gap in this kind of work between what you intend, and how people read it. Its impossible to second guess this and you must try it all and test it on viewers in order to find out what effect it will have.

• What will the viewer understand when they go in the room. You want them to be thinking ‘this is a stalkers room’, so then how will they interpret the video and audio?

• The realism is often creepier because its possible. How do you make it clear that the melodramatic effects are aimed at being theatrical. It might be scarier without the melodrama. It is difficult to make decisions about this kind of stuff near the end because you become very attached to everything you’ve made. Remember we will mark everything that you have done, Including how you have made decisions.

• What other fake narrative techniques could you exploit? How can you improve the webdesign to make it more convincing as a celebrity site? (n.b. get rid of the red eye). How do you fake the life of the stalker? It is theatre, and you job is to flesh out their life. E.g. would they have an unofficial fan site, with postings from the stalker. Create his history as well as hers.

• Loook at other online fake narrative work like Online Caroline, on XPT.com – made by Tim Wright and Rob Bevan. They have alos done other sites that play with the online worlds and faking stories.

• There are many other places you could extend the fiction, perhaps in a viral way, or through wikipedia entries. How can you push it all much further?

• Use greasemonkey to fake the URL at the top of your Amazon site. Why is it a Jane Fonda book? It would be better to make it something relevant to your theme.